Non Compliance with HPMP Contract and What Happens

I have been in the Health Practitioners' Monitoring Program (HPMP) for almost four years and never really had a problem before. Then, yesterday, while at lunch with a friend of mine, I received a call from my case manager. I had been in the process of getting approval to see a specific therapist for grief counseling, so I didn't think the call was going to be anything big.

My case manager told me that upon reviewing my work site monitor March report that she had to staff my case. I didn't understand at first; then, she went on to explain that I worked too many hours between my two jobs. I am approved to work no more than 40 hours per week at my full time job and no more than 24 hours per month at my PRN job. During March, I was orienting at my now full time job and I was working as close to full time hours as I could to learn the job and ensure it was a good fit; at the same time, I was still full time at my other job. Between the two I was working around 68-72 hours a week, give or take a few hours.

I knew I was breaking my contract but I have to work. I have to work to make ends meet--I have a mortgage; electric bill; food expenses; fuel expenses; drug screens to pay for; cats to make sure are fed and taken care of; and many other miscellaneous expenses that seem to come up every month. Then, there is the therapeutic element of working. When I work, I am not concentrating on my dad's death. I come home tired and I sleep. I cannot be idle. I get bored and start getting in my mind and then, I start getting in trouble.

As a result of breaking my contract, I am no longer allowed to work at my PRN job. I have not told my bosses yet but I will have to go talk to them soon about it. I am waiting on the letter from my case manager that explains the situation, so I have something to show my bosses to prove it is not me wanting to quit. I just am not allowed to work there anymore. I am hoping I will be eligible for re-hire and maybe after the program is done, I can maybe come back to that hospital on the same floor or in behavioral health and continue to be PRN.

I am scheduled to work one day this month and asked my case manager if there is any way I can work that one day before I leave. I have not heard back yet.

Not that I am planning to mess up again but I asked my case manager what happens if I am non compliant again. She told me that I get put on pre-dismissal status with HPMP, which is not good because I am so close to being done with HPMP (I have around 14 months left) and I have to be in HPMP or satisfactorily completed HPMP to keep my nursing license. 

On a side note, my case manager did talk to me about the therapist I wanted to go to for counseling. I cannot go to this therapist due to her not having experience in substance abuse counseling. I have until Monday to find another therapist and contact them for an appointment.

I found another therapist and contacted the office via email (one of the ways to set up an intake appointment) but have not heard back. I am kind of scared I will not meet the deadline.